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Chasing beauty is an impossible pursuit

By February 19, 2020November 23rd, 2020Feel Good, Inspiration

Chasing Beauty is an impossible pursuit

What is the definition of beauty?

And why do we chase it? 

What is the actual definition of beauty? If we use the dictionary, Cambridge states the adjective ‘beautiful’ as:

definition of beauty Very attractive. Very pleasant. Very Kind. (Cambridge)

Notice how it doesn’t say:

‘Blonde, tall, tanned, gap between thighs, perfect white teeth, perky boobs” 


“Chiselled abs, dark hair, strong jaw line, hairy chest.”

OR any other set of specific attributes. Instead it says “attractive, pleasant, kind.” It’s not even really specific to physical attributes. At least 2 out of 3 of these are in fact behavioural or energetic qualities. And what is ‘attractive’ to someone is different for every person and is often indescribable.

There actually is no definition of beauty because beauty is too subjective. What is aesthetically pleasing to one’s eye is ugly to the next. Therefore trying to be ‘pretty’ or ‘beautiful’ is redundant because everyone has different perceptions of what beauty is.

Perhaps we can instead adopt Coco Chanel’s definition of beauty:

Quote: “Beauty begins the moment you decide to be yourself”

Perhaps true beauty is being true to yourself!

Shirtless muscle man
Women dressed in 20s fashion

Does this mean I’m saying to not wear makeup, or ever dress up? Absolutely not! But instead I say, dress how you want to dress! Wear what you want to wear! Do you! Be you! You are enough! 

I have to admit, I’m not the most fashion conscious. Fashion has never been my thing, however, one of my good friends just loves fashion. She once told me that the reason she loves dressing up so much is because it is an extension of her personality. How she dresses helps her to create her voice. She emphasises that clothes are an essential need of every human. We need clothes for protection and if it’s something she has to wear each day, why not choose to make it fun and use it as a tool for self expression? I love this perspective!

Woman holding a guitar
Woman jumping happily on the beach

The poet Osho talks about how politicians and religious leaders have been able to enslave people by destroying our love for ourselves. If we do not love ourselves, then we feel unworthy, and are desperate to do anything in order to get some sense of self worth. Advertising works much the same. If we feel we always need something new to keep up with the trends in fashion and beauty then we never feel enough.  For some, this goes as far as depriving and harming our bodies in order to conform to some sort of ‘ideal’ beauty. Yet if we can come to realise that there is no ideal beauty, no perfect body, then we can come to love ourselves, trust we are enough and just be ourselves. Then our true inner beauty is able to shine!

If we say that something is beautiful, it implies that there must be an ugly because beauty cannot exist without the existence of ugliness. So rather than labelling what is beautiful and ugly, perhaps we can acknowledge that everything is beautiful and everything is ugly? 

As Marilyn Monroe said,

“Imperfection  is  beauty”

We are all imperfect. We are all beautiful. 




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About the


Emma Hawthorne sitting at the beach

Emma is a Performer, Yoga and Dance Coach, and lover of wine and chocolate. She has toured with many shows including Wicked, Mamma Mia, West Side Story, Dr Zhivago, Annie, and Hair. She also teaches Yoga, Dance and Mindful practices online at She currently lives in a bus she converted into a home on wheels and is passionate about find sustainable solutions to conserve and regenerate this beautiful planet.

Many years ago, Emma had severe Depression, Anxiety, and an Eating Disorder. Yoga, Meditation, Self Development practices, and having an open dialog with her friends and family have helped her find a renewed wellness. Emma is intent on helping others on their journeys to wellness and shifting mainstream ideologies that make people feel not enough. 

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